Aaaaaaaarrrghhhhhhhh!
Here is my beautiful seamless hybrid (Zimmerman’s raglan + saddle-shoulder combo) sweater, nearly done. Am a few rows away from casting off the neck. It took fourteen months to make, on and off, with many hiccups and visits to the frog pond along the way, largely due to gauge issues with the alpaca yarn.
Nearly every other round of this sweater is knit twisted, on a size 3 needle. For the yoke, I knit three rounds plain, three twisted, and it made for a pretty variation.
If you have never tried this much twisted stockinette on small needles, I urge you to. You can then join me in contrasting the beauty of the zig-zag, firm fabric this produces with the incredible soreness your left index finger will feel with the constant jabbing of the needle as you twist the stitch. Someone suggested to me on Knittersreview that twisting every alternate round helps keep pure alpaca yarn from stretching too much - it was so difficult to get a decent, firm stockinette fabric with the Elann Pure Alpaca that I went for it. Through all the jabbing and frogging, I visualised a warm, soft, roomy sweater at the end: late, to be sure, but every inch the unique 100% alpaca turtleneck the spouse had requested.
So why the arrghhhhh, you ask? It is because it isn’t just the yarn, but the entire project that has stretched too much already. Just take a look.
The blue fleece sweater on top fits the spouse well. Spilling out from all directions under it is the alpaca sweater, several sizes too large in every dimension but length. It is wildly loose for him, and looks horrible. I realise this is a truly crappy photo, but trust me, it is nothing compared to how it fits him. I didn’t dare show you that picture.
It’s not the gauge, it’s me. I thought he wanted this sweater modelled on a different, older and much roomier one and did the maths all wrong. The arms are at least four inches too long, the body about six inches too roomy and the shoulders way too wide. And before you ask, yes, I did have him try it on after joining the yoke, but other than slightly long sleeves, it seemed okay. At least, I thought that after it was all properly decreased and saddled and necked, it was going to be. I should have realised something was not quite right when the saddle shoulder began puckering at the back:
Actually, this should be a whole rant in itself, because however ill-conceived the overall size, I religiously followed Zimmerman’s percentage system for this pattern. Why my saddle ended up looking like an ugly puffed sleeve instead of the neat lines on all the other hundreds of seamless hybrids on Ravelry is a mystery. But I pressed on regardless, hoping that a good steam block would do the trick. Alas, it has not. The horrible droop of the saddle shoulder just about matches my mood right now, far down in the deepest dumps. I am SO angry and upset about this, because so many things went wrong for what was a really special project. I lost my notes and proper measurements, picked the wrong sweater to measure by, forgot all my plans for it over a really hot summer break, suffered through an awful yarn and stitch combination, and my usual blind hope that it would all work out in the wash really deserted me this time. I can’t even begin to consider frogging the whole thing and starting over - the very idea of doing another twisted knit stitch is making me ill, even for the love of my life. So my options right now are:
1) Set fire to the whole project and watch the natural fibre burn while I sip some strong, gold liquid.
2) Frog to the armholes, reduce sleeve length, figure out a yoke and decrease formula that will ensure a better fit at the shoulders while still keeping the body and sleeves intact.
3) Grit my teeth, finish the project as it is, and give it to a larger relative; heck, it *is* the gifting season after all
4) Take spouse to yarn store, pick a worsted weight alpaca blend (explain pitfalls and stretch-and-gauge trauma of 100% alpaca on size 3 needles along the way) and knit him another seamless hybrid in two weeks.
5) Pray for twenty pounds of instant weight loss by Christmas, because if #2 and #4 are being considered as viable options by then, then this will be trivial to achieve in comparison.
To sum up: Aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrgghhhhhhhhh! Any suggestions about which option will be easiest and most painless? Is there *any* chance that #2 might work? He so wanted a pure alpaca sweater, but I had the very devil of a time finding a 100% alpaca yarn that would fit my wallet and retain its shape as a large men’s pullover. Any suggestions for worsted blends that don’t cost the earth?